Have a Very Lenny Christmas


We were never born to hate one another, never brought into this consciousness to be divided. This year, instead of having a Merry Christmas, have a Lenny Christmas…

“A Lenny Christmas…”

Hi folks

If you have been reading this blog for awhile, then you already know to click on the photo and most of the time you will be taken to a video or a website. Of course, because it is two days ahead of Christmas 2016, and since it is that human beings in the United States have been handed what we have been handed, specifically just in these last few weeks alone, it should make a whole lot of sense to anyone at all that I wish you all a very Lenny Christmas…

“Love is gentle as a rose, and Love can conquer any war. It’s time to take a stand. Brothers and sisters, join hands…we’ve got to let Love rule…”

If you are any kind of music fan at all, specifically of Lenny Kravitz, then you will know what I mean by a Very Lenny Christmas.

We do not only have to let Love rule, we need to involve ourselves in the rebuilding of the world within our collective whole of human beings. We need…need to let Love, that thing that we apparently, at least a whole lot of the population of planet Earth seem to have forgotten about, rule.

We need to allow ourselves to fall into the depths of understanding one another at a much deeper, soulful level, and our thoughts need to be in line with healing on every level – from emotional to spiritual to financial to physical. On every level that is part of our consciousness, we have to allow ourselves to become vulnerable, to allow others like us into our Soul Tribes and allow it that they will meld into our lives, in our hearts and souls, and become what we were meant to be...which are even brighter beacons of light, so that those who hurt can find us, and we can teach them how to know what is the Truth of Love within themselves.

What we have right now is only half the battle won.

We have been through so very much that a lot of us professional weirdos are very tired, and it is a weary energy that is felt in the whole of us, in the collective of those of us who are thought as being the Keepers of the Divine Secrets, the Wise Ones, the people who are in your lives and on this planet in this lifetime to teach others, in every manner, what is Love. I am not talking about A Love Bizarre, but a Love so pure and contained of the Light within the entirety of us all, every single one of us, that our light shines so brightly that indeed, we have to wear shades.

We have been taught our whole lives that we have to see each other as a competitor, but were not taught that life is not a sport, not a game, but is a gift that we are given every day of our lives. We have been told that in order to do well, to have abundance, to be whole humans and have what we would each and personally consider as being “everything,” that someone else has to go without (no they do not. This is a lie. Please keep reading).

We have been made to believe that everyone else is out to get us, and then one day, typically the day after the fourth Thursday of the month of November, we see this competitive and…primal killing nature…alive and well in modern man.

We are treated to the foolishness, and the greed, and what seems to be the overwhelming need that some people have and display that tells the rest of the world that we are going to get our way, and no one is going to get in our way, and that if anyone does, we are going to make a freakin’ spectacle of ourselves…and up until recently, until some of us (the weirdos on the planet) decided just a few short years ago, that we were no longer willingly throwing our hats into the arena, no longer willing to be in the cage with the rest of the animals, and chose, instead, to give Love to others, rather than give an overpriced item that we are not sure our loved ones could use or even want.

All this does is prove that gift giving is a sport, and that we have to outdo each other in terms of what was spent, along with what we are planning to give, and that we believe will be a better show of whatever twisted form of Love it is to try to outdo others at a time of the year when we need to practice having a very Lenny Christmas.

“Love transcends all space and time, and Love can make a little child smile. Oh, can’t you see this won’t go wrong, but we’ve got to be strong…we can’t do it alone…”

Love is the thing that this world always needs, and Love is the thing that we think we have a choice about, but what we do not realize is that when it is the real thing, we do not know what to do with ourselves. We think we are meant to be crazy when we feel like that, but the truth is that we are giddy with excitement, because we Know Love.

And it is any kind of Love…the kind between two souls…and the kind between Soul Tribes…the kind that is the sort that heals, even though sometimes, it seems like it hurts. It hurts because sometimes, the Truth hurts. This is why we must, at this time in our lives and during this particular holiday season, 2016, let Love rule.

We no longer need to be afraid of who is and who is not going to be there for us, because we know this answer. We need not deal with what is not the truth, because we know, inherently and for sure, what the truth of us is and what the truth of us is is Love. We are made of Love, born of Love, need to Live in Love and to Be, in Love.

To Be, In Love is not only the way that it is typically thought to be -which is the sort that I mentioned in the paragraph before this one…the sort that is between two people . To Be, In Love means to be in a constant state of Love, and the kind that is of the higher sort, and is the kind that compels us to want to help others, want to be there for those we care about the most, and want, mostly, to live in this constant state, not only of Love, but what everything is that is Love.

We cannot know Love unless we are able to Love Our own Selves…

This is the truth.

We only know the Love within us, and we are dearly wanting to share it with the world, with one other person, but first, we have to know how to share it with ourselves. This does not mean that you have to not hope for Love from another, but, in order for you to know for real what it is, you have to be able to get past your own foibles, have to understand that you are who is meant to help you heal – not someone like me who teaches others how to do this, and not someone like the Gator who can do this from a distance and not someone like my cousins who are able to place hands on a person and understand what is a person’s damage.

We feel lonely when we have no outlet for this Love within, and that is when we are also being told, by Spirit, that we have to Love our selves completely, or else how will we be able to do that for another person? How will we know how to Love if we do not know this for and by ourselves? How will we know what is NOT sacrifice and what is sacrificed for the sake of the health of Love? How, indeed, will we ever be able to discern what is the truth of the Love that we each and actually deserve, the sort that takes time to build and the sort that wakes you up in the middle of the night thinking about this Love that exists within and eventually, outside of one’s own self?

How will we know this?

We won’t.

…meaning that it needs to be a Very Lenny Christmas if this is, indeed, the Truth of you and who you are.

The Bottom Line Truth Is..

We are here to Love one another, here to help each other learn and to heal and to grow. This is the gift which is inherent within us all, and the one that we seem more inclined to think is not worth the value of a tangible item inside of a box that someone in a land far, far away built and that a conglomerate company somewhere in this world sold, and which a part time employee at a mall somewhere was paid to wrap in a bunch of shiny paper.

We are here to Be, In Love, to be the ones who have this killer bent towards healing the soul of the planet, one soul at a time, through whatever means it is that we have been birthed into this consciousness for.

We are here to experience the joy that is the Love shared between two people, but not until it is that our souls are ready for it – we cannot Love anyone else until we can Love our very selves.

We are meant to be with one another, to hold ourselves accountable to the Love within us, to share it and give it away, because that is what it is meant for – to give, not to hang onto and play pick and choose….but to Love all, even if from a distance, and even if merely in the form of forgiveness, because we all know that we forgive others, not to let them off any imaginary hook, but so that we will have peace for ourselves rather than anger that rots and festers.

We are meant to be part of this great big energy that is The Very All of Us, and the Whole of Us is meant, without any sort of resistance, bother to be part of the global human family, even with the people who we would never give a second thought or glance to – yes, even those who you would consider as being “the least of us.”

We are meant to give this Love, at all times, unflinchingly, unabashed, and unconditionally, to others, regardless of their beliefs, their income level, their place of origin, their ancestral beginnings….every damned thing…we are meant to show this Love to this World, always.

We are supposed to do this, because this is what we are born for…this Christmas, please enjoy the company of those closest to you, and please Love You, as well, and give your Love to your closest soul family members.

Love is automatic when it is real.

Practice Love. Give Love. Know Love. Be, In Love…

To you all…please have a Very Lenny Christmas….

Please click on the links …the gift of music is always lovely to have…please enjoy!




In Spades

In Spades Photo Mana'o Blog.png

 The truth of all of this madness that lots of us are experiencing is a collective energy of correction of the Soul Vs. the Ego-Self, and it is happening in spades…

You might think, like I think, a LOT lately, that somehow, the gods are having fun at our collective expense.

Over the last few months and weeks, we have witnessed the comatose nature of common sense with the ushering in of this..president elect….and we are seeing after a very long set of generations a lot of ugliness that has happened to our Native American brothers and sisters, my own Hawaiian global ohana, and, as well, the water supplies all over our nation being tampered with and, at least in my own leanings, poisoned, on purpose, because there is a guy who walks the crust of the earth believing that we humans do not have the right to water – because he wants to keep it all, bottle it all and sell it all to us in the form of “healthier” water. 

…and there is a certain set of carbon based human beings of a certain low soul-nature who believe that the things going on still at Standing Rock were not somehow all part of this horrid plan to make certain that we be sent backward in time to a place where certain people among us, myself included, become lesser than others, because of whatever it is that we are being told, but, where it is that we with darker hue skin end up having to, all over again, fight for what was ours…including the rights of indigenous peoples to our lands. To some of these people who this person is choosing, Sacred land is just real estate and NOT lands that our ancestors and our transitioned holy people – our Medicine People and our Kahuna, our Shaman, our Witches and our Sorcerers, our energy healers, light workers, our people who check the box “other,” still, when we are asked on a government form, a loan application, anything “official” about what our origins are.

Goddess help those of us who were not born here. Goddess help those of us who are of a dual-soul. Goddess help those of us not super wealthy, not a certain color of skin, not a whole lot of things…Goddess help us, even if we were born and raised in this country.

Goddess help us.

And ALL of us, even us weirdos – every single one of us is being shown things in our lives that we would rather not have to look at it, because all of it looks like massive losses, a whole lot of further desecration of our Mother Earth, loads and loads of women haters, religious zealots, entitled CEOs who are being turned into politicians, and let us not forget that children all over the world, even here in the states, are going to bed at night hungry, and yes – here in the richest country in the world…our children go to bed at night, sometimes in the car which doubles as the family home, hungry.

And people who thought they were good hearted people made it a public thing that they were not thinking about the future generations’ ability to feel safe in their own skins…YES- SKINS, namely if it is a beautiful dark hue- but only about how they might win something that truly pertains to them but in a VERY VERY far away manner.

You showed….okay MANY, MANY of you showed the world – YES..THE WORLD….the truth of who you are.

I am going to likely lose a lot of readers with this next comment, and I am okay with it, but, those of you who chose like you did also showed us who you are, for real, and if that is not the way that all of you are for real, then you voted in the heat of the moment. And here we are, all of us now, wondering why it is that there are still people defending a lying treasonous human being who publicly bullied a disabled person, who objectified women, basically spat upon the collective of poor working people whose care he left in the hands of people who would rather see them no longer in existence.

This is what I have to believe, given that I am female, that I am outspoken, that I am left-leaning but middle-ground standing, that I am, unlike MANY of my own family members, one of those …darker-hued Americans…fun stuff….none of them see ANYONE BUT ME….they do not see me as a threat to anything OTHER than the possibility that, on any given occasion, I might threaten that they can bank on seeing me in the future, and that indeed, I might bring up a fun memory from our shared kidhood…but that is all they feel threatened by me about….which really, it’s not THAT big of a deal.

I want people to know that this is what and how some of you chose  – choosing how you did and hurting people like me, a person who, while she was younger, might have wanted to go toe to toe with anyone willing to bring her harm, but who now no longer can deal with violence, with bullying, with the put down of people who might not have had a choice OTHER than to have to survive by public means. I want people to know that I was raised as a Christian, by parents who, to this day, still believe in the power of their own spiritual beliefs…and because of this, I have a very hard time thinking that those who voted for “the religious right” chose so for any other reason than their level of belief in a deity that most who knew me as a younger me who then also chose to make fun of me because I HAD to go to church…. that they felt threatened by a whole lot of things.

The one thing that you ought to have felt threatened by was just exactly how you have chosen what you have, which was only to win, which told a whole LOT of us, on some level, that not only did you believe none of us would go through what we have gone through FOREVER…you also believed that we would NOT think that your choice for this person supported not only a lying narcissist, but also a guy who actually thinks, perhaps even believes, that being publicly outed as a liar, on any level, is not only not good for the country, but, he might well find out that it is also not good for business.

Winning is only one time, specifically when you have treated something as important as the choice you each made become the biggest spectacle ever…almost like it was some sort of sporting event…this was how you – most of you – treated all of this..choosing… that you did.

I might be wrong. I hope I am. But, after having witnessed a whole lot of stupidity over these last few weeks after November 8th, 2016, I do not think I am.

What I think I am is disappointed in the idea that there are a LOT of people who know me, who know that I am NOT white, who know that I love people, even when they hurt me, and the only thing that I can do by that time is to Love them from a distance, just so that in some small manner, I do not have to hurt one more minute by them, and are people who also were not thinking about the idea that they know folks like me, swear that they love us.

They know folks like me who are not the type who goes into these things lightly, that as an Ordained Minister of the non-denominational type, as the type that is Kahuna Wahine, is Medicine Woman, is scientist geek in behavioral sciences – not one of you thought about your friends who look like me, who are female, like me, who loved you all without question or regard and in this moment, after all of the ridiculousness, the only thing that I question now is why did you NOT think about us, your minority, your female, your gay , your working class friends and family members who would be, in some manner, affected in the manner that we have been.

I hope, for real, that your boy can handle all of us, all at one time, when we decide that our patience has been worn thin by the very lot of you becoming ugly creatures in the soul, when you realize that the thing that you thought was the right thing was actually the thing that you ought to have thought about and when you punched that hole in that card, you were punching it on behalf of me, too.

I hope that, for real, and this is not all of you – there are some of you who actually ARE a person whose values are truly what the right’s are – but for real, those of you who chose not to think about your friends who are like me – not white, not male, not Christian, not YOU – and who are already feeling our own losses, because that is what you chose for us, is what you chose for me, for my budding feminist daughter, my oldest son who respects women because his mother taught him through her actions and her truths what to look for in a woman when the time comes that he is wanting to start a family of his own, my baby…my Joshua…who is spending his kid years in a culturally diverse neighborhood, being taught in one of the very best charter schools in the state, by teachers who are very liberal and very loving when they realize who they are being kind to while these kids are not in our care…


It is not that I feel slighted by this orange faced clown who people took seriously – I feel slighted, somewhat, by the idea that people who have known me for years voted for a guy who blatantly lied and still does, who keeps secrets when he is not supposed to, who picks fights with the people who he is supposed to be serving – us – whenever one of us has an issue with him or his people, rather than practicing what he is headed for doing, he attacks one of us, rather than correcting his particular people. He stole money from students. He is trying hard to keep all of his international interests, and now that the reality is here….he is not being the guy who he was when he was campaigning.

Yet, even that is not my issue.

My issue is always going to be that those who know me do not realize that choosing this person also was your choice in terms of what is actually in your soul. My issue is the idea that you might have wrongly believed that I would agree with all of the crap that we heard, would give this guy a chance or something like that, as if you would do the same in return, and that the hurtful things that your choice brought into light, the idea that you might have thought people like me would be okay with the idea that you did not think about the entirety of the whole, and possibly only by right of what color you were born as.

You might think that I am being harsh, but, I am not being harsh at all – I am being this way because for weeks, your choice has brought harm to my psyche, to my being of self in that I love you, that there is no choice that I make, when speaking in terms of who we are and how my choices affect you in every manner, which does not involve how it might affect you. How you came to the conclusion that I might, that anyone not thinking in the weak manner that you were, agree with your choice or the bullying that a lot of us who DID not choose that guy, is beyond me. I used to believe that you knew me well enough to also know that your words that are attached to your choice and mostly the truth behind your choice – this is what brought a lot of people you said you loved more harm than I thought you were capable of. Your choosing that guy, to a lot of us, meant that you no longer chose us…at all, if what you thought was we would not be harmed by it.

We were, and it was not economic, and neither was it anything political or tangible.

It was all about the truth of your soul, the truth of your feelings of low self-worth and inferiority, and the only thing that you chose with was this, masked as things that you do not like, because you refuse to learn to understand them. I must ask you each and all to go within your selves and see if you could tell a foreign child..maybe 5 or 6 years old..that you hate them because they do not believe in your god, that you despise them for existing, that you wish their parents were dead because whatever fucking stupid reason that you thought you had, when in reality, it was not a reason.

It was an excuse.

I said it.

Deal with it.

You felt bullied by the ones who were bullied – all because we were exercising our right to being the best versions of ourselves, all on our own, and we were, still are, getting better at being those best versions. Would you really call this choice showing everyone that this is the best representative version of yourselves, down deep in the bones of your soul?

Can you even answer that question without hurting one of us again or having to go through the pain of having made such a choice?

And this is how you answered that energy – by choosing with your arrogance, your ego-selves, and not with the heart that, for those who chose this way, I am hoping that deep in the bones of your souls, you are still who I have always known you to be, which is not someone with an excuse for having chosen, not in favor of people like me, but, in favor of people like the actuality of the truth of who you are and have always been…apparently.

I get it – people grow and become new, but this is not new.

This is VERY OLD THINKING…and is NOT thinking that is the manner of your own generation, because I know that you were not the people who were raised this way. Your parents did not teach you this…manner of excusing your selves from thinking about the whole, rather than your tiny, daily waning sense of your own truth in self.

I could not ever make a choice because I might feel like I am being affected by something that I have no control over, such as someone’s color of skin, or their religious beliefs, or their gender or their lifestyle…anything that is not someone’s choosing, or perhaps is something that has been theirs to embrace from a very young age, is the thing that many people were not thinking about. It doesn’t matter, will not ever matter, that I am told that I am loved by you, and while it is none of anyone’s business what anyone’s choice at all is, what I was told by your choice was….is….how you actually feel about people who you do not know anything about, about beliefs that are not in line with your personal own, about how you feel about the disabled, how you feel about women and our rights and our rights to choose what is right for our lives and our bodies….you made your choice against my only daughter, and my sister in law, my nieces, my friends.

You chose to bring back to men the right to play grab ass with us (and if you have known me for any long amount of time, then you also know that I AM NOT ONE WHO LIKES HAVING HER PERSON GRABBED- ANYWHERE). You chose to let this…very PROUD promoter of violence, in the form of rape and verbal bullying against women and all of everything beautiful about womankind…LEAD US. You chose this person who has been the thing that we have NOT condoned, this whole…arrogance that so many of you had to just …NOT SHOW THE REST OF US….you chose, with WHO you chose, to show us what your actuality is and you did so IN SPADES.

In Spades…

While you might not have thought in this manner as you poked that hole in that card stock, it was the only thing that we who work in the world of Spirit, whose goals and lives and jobs in this lifetime have everything to do with healing the soul of the planet, you were making things different and not in the right way for those like us.

Your choices are everything, and I have a lot of pals who are actual conservatives, and if those people voted how they did – that is THEIR right, and they are the very ones who are NOT poking fun at me because they assume that just because I am female, that I voted for the other person. To you guys – you know I love you, you know that I KNOW you voted in terms of what you have always believed. I would NEVER expect you guys to choose apart from your party. You know I love you. You also know that you are not who I am writing to right now….by any means….you know this. (Including and specifically, you, Coleen…stay real, lady…)

It is the rest of you, the ones – many who I grew up with – the ones who are still gloating, and choosing to still create a problem with me, for whatever reason you have..because you are actually one of those people who, in a deep seated manner, and in some small way, actually feels the way that particular majority of people who voted in that manner, voted.

Yes…I said it, so deal with it, because I know the difference between a person who is actually “party proud” and wears it, and to those people I must tip my proverbial hat, because really, I am likely one of their most, if not THE most, eccentric and liberal, albeit moderately so, friend they have and person who they know, and they have NEVER had a problem with me.

When they have corrected me and my antics, it is not because of anything MORE than that they believe that I am now behaving like the thing that they are not.

The thing that they are not is …fake.

And yes – they each and all know EXACTLY who they are, and we have a great amount of respect for each other and we always have. And why?

Because I am not worried about their ideals, their likes and dislikes, because I am not interested in their way in terms of their beliefs – they know that I know who they are, and that they are true to who they have always been.

It is the rest of you who voted because you thought you knew what was going on, who believed that the reason you chose how you did was because you felt like a fucking loser, over, of all things, your own people taking advantage of the working class (read: YOU GUYS)  and your own people who do not know what the fuck you were choosing. If you felt like a loser, and your choice made you feel like a winner, the only thing that you have “won” from me is your way out of my life.

You chose going with the crowd, the one that hates what they do not understand, and the one that doesn’t like the idea that we are a diverse populace, and the one that spent its life bullying people, just so that you would “win” by fists and your bullshit, rather than on your own brave heart…you chose effrontery, because you felt threatened, you felt belittled by us, and you had no reason to feel that way. All you felt was this essence of effulgence coming from us.

That was called, is still called pride in ourselves, because we have been who has been real, and by this I mean that at our core, we are the realest people on the planet, and you just do not like it when we are in your face with it, even though we do not even give you assholes the time of day – it does not work that way. We are who we are, and prior to this person “winning,” you were either very dearly and truly the you who I have known, who many have known…

…or, you really are this big of a fake, and not a very good one if you are trying to pass it off on me that you truly are being true to anyone at all, but rather and only to your inner self that felt so afraid of losing…

It is totally because truly, you are now and have always been a loser.

Namely if you had to choose a bully who is only choosing more bullies…who is proving to us all, right now, that he is the right leader for a small minority of people who themselves have always felt like they need to have a means by which we, the rest of the people, will be told that yes…yes, indeed not only are we going to pay for your feelings of being losers…

…that you will continue to believe that this is the right way to be, namely when you KNOW that this is NOT the real you.

My only question, for real, is how long have you been a phony, and has it been as long as I have been loyal a loyal friend to you?





…about Standing Rock





It means “Unity.”

This is what all of this…chaos…with all of this unneeded pipeline was all about…it was the Universe’s way of making us look at ourselves.

We are not in as bad shape as we thought we were, at least not in the way that we were interpreting what it was that we were all watching happen…yes, the 2016 elections.

We were in unity, we were in lokahi, but, at the level that we did not need to be. I have to put it out and in front of everyone, right now, and that is that in the most unconscious manner, we let our egos out to play.

Yet, what we were not prepared for, at all, was that the other team…the pipeline investors…wanted to take the ball home, because they were losing. They found out that the kids in the neighborhood were not having that. They found out that throwing sand in their eyes …that we meant business – we were no longer, on many levels, willing to allow ourselves to be bullied by the kids who lived in the more affluent neighborhoods. This is the only way that it can be described because this is the way that it felt, at least to this intuitive.

We found out a whole lot about ourselves, and lots of it was important.

We found out that we don’t play well with each other and that it is not now, nor has it ever been our fault. We also found out that we were not willing to let our indigenous family ever have to fight for what has always been there, were not willing to make them repeat the travel on the trail of tears. We showed up, in droves, because they were not the only ones who were not havin’ that.

None of us were, and at one moment we forgot the actual reason why- the children, not just of Standing Rock, but, all of them, all over the planet, and not only here at home in the United States.

The children, all over the planet, were watching…even the ones in the ugliest neighborhoods on the planet, the roughest places in our communities…I know this, because I reach out to those ones in particular, because those are the truest people, the golden people – they are the ones who know struggle. They are children turning the ugliest places into the playgrounds that they don’t have access to…the harshest thing to hear is the laughter of children at play in places they ought to not be laughing, but laugh,they do.

…because only in childhood can beauty be experienced in the midst of chaos…because childhood is chaotic, but it did not have to be this chaotic. We forget that it doesn’t take much to scare children. Then one day, we remembered, because teachers in our public schools are talking about it…and it reached our kids, and it became real to them.

We saw the fears of the kids at Standing Rock in our own kids.

We remembered what was important, and it was not what we thought it was. We found out that we are legion, are numerous, are here in droves. We found out, on a large global scale, that we care…and it is not just a little bit, but a whole, whole lot. 

This is who we are, we, the people.

We care.

About each other.

About children in particular.

We want to save them from the monsters of life, of our times, and we want them to be what we were never, which was living in an actual energy of feeling safe and secure within our homes, in our lives and most importantly, in ourselves. We have, without getting ugly, and only with the heart and soul of the planet, of the Universe, of the Goddess, right there, prodding all of us who are called “Mom” to do what is right, no matter what, and that was to make certain that this tiny little patch of land that does not belong to anyone BUT those Sioux children, stayed theirs.


And it happened.

It Happened…Lokahi WORKED

Our unified stance, NOT AGAINST anything but FOR the generations to come...THIS is what caused this outcome, this beautiful beginning, because this is not about an end to anything other than that making it completely clear to the powers that WANT to be, that they are not above the populace, and that the populace, when the innocent are involved, is GOING TO be victorious.

The populace came to the call of duty – even the retired military…one of them walked 800 miles to make it there, to be there for his people, the tribal Nations of America…the Native American Peoples. This was an ugly time, a time that showed us our black and our white, sometimes literally, and we had to face ourselves. When it came to looking at the vulnerable nature of children, of any nation, we began to remember who we are.

We began to recall the things that were important to us when we were children.

As parents, we are responsible to make our kids feel secure, not only physically, but, within themselves and emotionally. They hear everything, and they are lot more intuitive than we think they are…and I only recall this because this is what I was. I had an imagination, and it is not always beautiful. Sometimes it is scary, because I have been that child who felt alone, and who sometimes, in her own confusion, was alone, because I was so…different. The children who are different – these are the ones who are most affected. ALL CHILDREN WERE AFFECTED BY THIS, whether we know it or not, believe it or not...this is the truth.

They know now that people are unkind, but there are people who will always love them, and people who will be there, in their corner, if not in their lives, pleading with the world to please, remember them, and more, remember you and who you were and what scared you when you were just a child. Remember that you were this vulnerable, and that there are big people who will think about themselves, who will spend insane amounts of money, thinking about their own children and what that investment can do for these kids of theirs.

But, the world has children outside of those golden walls of affluence.

Not all children live in affluence.

This was not what was thought about, two years ago, when it was that this pipeline came into meetings and think tanks and things that the rest of us know nothing about…at all. We cannot even begin, the majority of us, to think about how much money that we are talking about, only that it was an amount of money that we cannot even begin to think about making, let alone seeing, in our lifetimes, even combined with those who are closest to us.

These are the people who we are talking about, and these are the people who are not seeing past their bottled water and their ability to make us all think that that level of purity is in a bottle, rather than in the core of the Mother…Haumea.…Earth.

We are mere humans, and we are not here to change this place. It is here to help us change to do what is needed to keep the future safe.

Keep the Future Safe

Water is life.

It is.

My Astrological element is water. So is the Maestro’s. If anyone can tell anyone else about the destructive, or the transformative, or the life giving, or the anything else…of water, because we are each of the water element…it is either of us. The each of us. We get it. It sucks, but we get it. It is scary how much we understand things that happen around us, but, when it happens to us, because we see it outside of us, then it happens in our lives, perhaps to us, or to the other, and we just don’t get it.

Even though we totally get it. Because we are water. We know that water is life. We know that damage to the self is unneeded, but it happens, but, who would do this to themselves – what would cause humans to think that other humans would want their own children to go through what a special-to-themselves-group of people would think of themselves, but not of children, from anywhere, and who are any children?

Who would do all this damage…and why?

Why would anyone Native want to hurt anything Earth? They wouldn’t


And then this whole…#NoDAPL thing happened, and suddenly, the mom in me comes out, and she comes roaring to the forefront of things, at least in her own world, where she makes the very most difference. And the way that she tells people about this ugliness happening, this crap that was going on to these indigenous people in North Dakota for a very, very long time now in our lives, in these times…is to relate it to them in terms of their children.



That me…the one who celebrates holidays with her children because of her children and their existence in her life. That me, the one who understands being the child, as well as being the mom, and being the intellectual, and the behavioral scientist, and looking at it as though it is a people soup and not the sort that I like.

It is like the ants in the pile of vomit that a bunch of over-indulgent investment bankers who just got a little too …indulged…with their need for us all to be invested in the idea that we need oil, rather than realizing that the Beatles were right in that indeed….here comes the sun and all of its life giving, energy producing goodness. We don’t realize this. They needed us dependent on their oil, and they wanted to poison water, because one of their own people – another super rich guy – wants the human race to believe that we do not have a right to water.

And a lot of us believe this crap…until we bring it home to them, and suddenly someone like me puts it in perspective for other people and remind them of what it is that they would do for their own children…and why was it not that big of a deal that we not allow this to happen, no matter what. We do not see what is there until it comes to the forefront of things, and then, we want to know how it is that we have been involved.

Then we think about things in another manner….

Until it happens in our lives, and sometimes, when it happens on the grand scale, where what we have to say feels like it is not about us or our own, but that on the large scale.

North Dakota is that …or rather, was that grand scale.

Global scale.

Together we made sure that we all knew what was happening, and all of the moms could relate to this, because in most indigenous nations, it is the women who are the power behind the people.

Women are typically peaceful, intuitive, nurturing.

We protect the young, no matter whose young they are…we protect the future, because that is what we do…we literally bring into the world, the generations of the future. We are the moms. We are the ones who bring the people who change this place. We don’t know this, but we each and all hope this. Then one day, we realize that it is only our world that it matters that they know this is important. Because this is the thing that they take into their world, so that in that world, particularly with their kids, they want the thing called Love to be recognized and that they created and exists in their world.

They have to learn this from somewhere, and the people who teach them what they know are the moms.

We are who teach them Love. We are their first Love. We matter to them. We are the ones who show them what a mom is supposed to appear to look like, but, then we grow up and we find out that there are moms on this planet who look apart from the thing that we have been taught. We end up realizing that Mom, in and of her place in our singular lives, is important.

But, on the level that is global?

Mom is every single one of us who is actually called “Mom” to at least one person, whether we birthed them or not, blood or not – this is our place. We are here to protect the future. This is why the Water Protectors are Women. They are the Women of Standing Rock. These women are the face of the collective of warrior women, for real, in their lineage. It is the same thing that is Hawaiian, and on that end, we are as tribal as the women of Standing Rock.

We are ka po’e o ka wai…the People of the Water, we Polynesians.

We are the ones who understand, very personally, the connection humans have with water.

This is why this was very, intensely personal for us.

This is why all of the Polynesian Nations were represented at Standing Rock.

This is why we knew what we were fighting for alongside these other global tribal peoples, and it was a very beautiful thing that was born of a very vile thing…a thing called greed.

Yet, in lokahi, we showed the powers that want to be, and together, online and in person, all over the world, we showed them our war paint…and it was not what they expected.

They expected savages, and they were not met with it. Yet still, they fired, because that is all they were ready for…this cowboys and indians thing. It didn’t happen that way, at all.

Instead, they were met with the women.

They were met with the leaders.

They were met with the scholars.

They were met with the clergy.

They were met with everyone in the world.

But mostly, they were met with the future, met with the children.

Somehow, it worked. The power of immense Love, immense Faith in ourselves, in each other…this is what happened at Standing Rock. We fought on the side of Love, not against Hate. We prayed, and broadcasted, and wrote, and supported, and prayed, and shared, and liked and we did it and we did not stop.

We did not give in.

We were, the very all of us, the People of the Water.

We were very, dearly the People of Aloha…

This is who we are.

The People of The Water.

Standing Rock made us all become the People of The Water...

…we did it….

We did it







SCATHING: Some words about your freedom of speech and my freedom of not wanting to put up with your shit.


When you choose to challenge others through being a scathingly ugly person, it is like stealing their right to freedom of not hearing your crap as much as it is someone else trying to steal your right to freedom of speech.

I have a problem with people lately, more than I have in the past.

I am someone who enjoys the freedom of speech that we are afforded in this country.

I am a writer.

As such, it is mine to enjoy this thing called free speech.

As a public speaker..again…free speech.

However, in some cases, as an American who appreciates everything that every veteran in this country and its history has done, namely losing their lives, so that my right to sit here, for the rest of my life, and write these things, I am a bit dismayed with the idea that there are people who have taken it upon themselves to attack others for having a different opinion than they do. I have the right to think that something is funny, and I have the right to agree with things that some people think are dumb. I have the right to write these things, because I am protected by the same speech laws and rights that others have that allow them the freedom to state, verbally or in writing, whatever it is that they might.

This includes them being …horrid…to us, just because that is who they are, and how they are, and what they do. They do this for whatever reason they might have, but the one reason that I have known, for a lot of years, and now, too, online, is that a bully is a bully, no matter what.

In the past, and not that long ago in the past, the world was not the scathing place that it is now.

“Scathing”…it is a very…passionate … word.

We are, by and large, as humans, very passionate with our words, sometimes in a very ugly way, especially when we feel like there is anything at all to “win.” We like to “win” no matter what, and it is because we have not, a whole lot of us, been taught to also learn to lose well. Whoever said that life is a game didn’t think before they said it, because all that did was turn everyone into either a “winner” or a “loser” and the truth is that life is NOT a game, but an experience.

I do not feel as though it takes anyone at all very much …in them…to be nice, or at least cordial, even though you want to be otherwise. It seems very odd to me that anymore now, we seem more inclined to give an opinion rather than to state facts and more, to state what are our own actual facts to anyone at all, even those who, because of their demeanor, whether it is online or offline, disagree with us.

In fact, that is the one time that we need to be on our best behavior and if anyone at all knows about it being hard to behave one’s own self, it is this chick.

Behave your damned selves already…

It might well be that over the course of the last year, things that have happened in my life, as well as in the lives of those who are the very closest to me, that I have chosen to not argue with people when it comes to their opinion…unless, of course, they attack me online.

No. I cannot take a joke, and no, I do not want to make anyone think, for any reason at all, that I want to go back and forth with them – I don’t. The hardest time that I have had in exercising this…behavior of mine…and that is nothing at all like it used to be (in your face, ghetto style even). There was a time when I used to speak to people as though I was smarter than they were and sharper with my words than lots of people were (and yes, I think this way now, but it is not the same energy…please, keep reading), and thought so because why?

Because I was that good, and I could do this whole…being horrid to others in writing… and was good at it…that’s why.

That was a very long time ago.

These days, I happen to like walking on the side of the rope that tells me to always, even when I am right, even when I am using foul language…try hard to be nice to others.

I am not going to fail to what I used to be. I will not now, and within the best of my better abilities, try hard to NOT, go there, ever, when it comes to arguing with people, namely not over an opinion that might be something that not everyone agrees with.

I will not be abused in any manner, by anyone, ever again…no, not even on something as ridiculous as social media.

I have the same right to not have to put up with peoples’ ugliness on my network profiles as they do to not have to put up with mine, and more, not have to put up with their nastiness on things which I post and are based completely on my opinion. I maintain the right that we all have to NOT be disrespected, NOT be called names, NOT have to deal with shitty people and their shittiness…at all.

I have, over time, kept my ability to demean things and people, or at least have tried to, NOT get personal with those who I know, in check. It is a challenge, to say the very least, but I do it because I have, in a year’s time, been honed by life. I have endured a LOT, with, for, and because of other people. Only in a few instances has it been that I loved them enough to stick by them that it made it all worth while for me. I have watched the one person who I love, and love as much as I love those three people who call me mom (and a few who call me this and who are my adopted soul kids) go through the unkindnesses that he has gone through. Think whatever you want to, but, it takes very little to be kind to people. Even when we don’t agree with them.

Most folks have me pegged as someone who is possessed of a sharp, forked tongue, when the reality is that I cannot lie about things and have a clear conscience about it afterwards. It takes me a bit of time to call people on their stuff, and when I do, I am questioned, as though I have questioned them personally about who they are, rather than them bothering to see that this is me, in writing, in all of my personal brilliance and glory, able to make choices based on the things that are important to me, rather than on what is popular right now.

What is popular right now is hatred and ignorance.

I am too educated for either of those two things unless it is well placed. I am not about to go rounds with people who cannot keep up with me intellectually, just because all of their lives, they never valued intelligence.

I have maintained that these people have the right to not feel like I am attacking them, because I am very good at attacking people, whether you believe that much or not.

However, I find it boring to attack, and will not have the thought in my head to seek out other peoples’ different opinions. I would rather be kind to someone over something we have in similarity than to continue to tell them what it is that I am and that they are not. They are able to do the same thing, and then what are you going to do, get mad at them?

I have the same right that anyone else has to not have to feel like I am being demeaned, being belittled, being thought of as anything other than my damned self. As my damned self these days, the last thing that I am going to do is become one of those…crazy-ass, loud-ass females who has to get loud just to get heard.

And this especially applies to men who like to respond in an ugly way to anything that I have to say on my walls. As ridiculous as it sounds or reads, what you are seeing there are the things that I think about. While you reserve the right to your freedom of speech, I, too, reserve certain rights, and one of those rights is the right to NOT be cyberbullied. 

By anyone, of any age…ever…


I might be loud, but, there are a lot of people who, these days, will tell you that I do not get loud on people when I get mad anymore (unless I am triggered…that is different).

I get educated on people, and remind them that I am not going to deal with them or their crap, that I am not going to deal with one more person, specifically ANY man, being an asshole, just because that is their right to not only be that way, but to express through their freedom of speech just how much of an asshole they have the propensity towards being.

As much as it is their right to their opinion, it is my right to not respond in their favor when I have been abused in writing.

I will not allow others to belittle me, call me a liar, tell me that I am wrong for having an opinion about what it is that I think is good, right, moral and something that I believe in. I will never again let another carbon-based being, no matter who they are or who they think they are, no matter what they want to believe or what it is that they have opinions about in terms of what I believe…those people will never, ever get to me again.

There is nothing in their right to freedom of speech that states that I have to sit there and take their shit.

I don’t.

No one does, and really, that is not an opinion, but a fact.

As much as we all enjoy our freedom of speech in this country, we sure do not value sometimes very needed silence. We say we value education, and then many of us behave as though being educated means that we think we are better than other people, and so that means that in some places, and in the minds of a few thousand people, educated people are actually stupid people.

This is not my stating that there are not some among us who are very intelligent. It is to state though that too many of us tend to speak about things, calling ourselves experts because we have an opinion that lots of other people agree with. Lots of people think that this makes them smart. It doesn’t take a lot of smarts to make people think you are smart. It just takes you to know who your greatest audience is going to be and where you are going to get the most agreement with your opinions that you will get people who think that, based on that opinion, they are right.

Again…popular does not mean right, in any manner at all. When we think that our opinions are more important than are the facts of other people and their lives and who they are, we are not being smart, but merely acting like we are so that we can be the smartest of the opinionated people. This is fine.

Been there.

Done that.

It’s lonely there. I promise.

We think we are so damned smart here, when really, all we are is opinionated. We allow it that other people can and do piss us off a whole lot, over, of all things, opinions instead of facts. We allow what others think about anything at all, that is not the same thing that we think, is somehow the thing that makes us superior to them.

Just like all else that doesn’t…such as income level, zip code, race…

It doesn’t.

That people win things wrongly all the time is one thing.

That other people will gloat over the fact that a win is a win is another thing all together. The most alarming thing about this is that just as much as we will accept other people treating us badly, we will also apologize to them for our having had a difference of opinion. Why?

What are you sorry for? Why are you sorry for having an original thought? What is making any one of us believe that who we are is such a big deal that what we opine about is somehow the truth of all truths.

And this is the truth…that our own truth, at least where we, ourselves and ourselves alone, are concerned, is the truth. It is our truth. If we know it is factual to our own lives, then the only truth it needs to be is ours. No one else’s will matter because very simply, their truth and your truth will not be the same truth. It won’t be the same truth because you are not the same two people – each person is given to their own version of the truth. My truth is not going to match yours.

Big deal.

I am not going to sit here defending my truth because it is not going to change. Where you are getting the idea that I am somehow okay with being verbally and “in writing” abused by anyone is foreign to my thought process because in my thoughts, I am not a bad person who deserves to be treated in the manner that many have, over the last few weeks, treated anyone at all.

It is not particular to just me. It seems rampant, this constant…fucking with people.

It seems like it has come to an entire world filled with no-holds-barred vitriol and for what?

So you can feel like an even bigger winner through being a scathing asshole?

Disagreeing with me is one thing, but please manage to keep your manners about you when pointing out your disagreement, and do, please, if you have the balls to say anything that is anything at all different to what I have as my belief and my opinion, also keep to the facts…and keep your name calling to yourself. It ain’t okay, and no, I am not cool with it.

I won’t allow people to be bad to me, or be anything but what I am like with them personally…which is always typically very kind.

If I am not being kind, then it means, very simply, that you have not been kind to me. That is all that this means. If I am being an asshole to you, it means that in the past, you have been one to me and made an excuse as to why you had and will maintain that right.

If you have been mean to me, you will know you have been, because I will refuse to return your calls, your texts, and of course, your online jabs at me.  It does not bother me that you have your opinions about me, and it does not bother me that you have those thoughts about me that I might not like. However, when they are thoughts, and they are not voiced, I won’t have this…idea…about you that somehow, my friendship with you does not merit the same weight of importance to you as how your words affect me.

And let’s expand on that …your words….for a moment, shall we?

Words, as I have said many times in the past, have power…use them wisely

Whether or not we hit other people back with our words is on us. We have forgotten how to talk to one another in a caring and loving way. We have forgotten that the things that are not going on in our lives for real, the things that are collectively felt and known, things that we do not have a choice about, and we have forgotten that we are not here to be anything other than love, or a lesson in what is not love.

Hurting others, namely when we know them personally, is not a game, at least not to the people who we do this to. I am no stranger to people being crappy to me, all because I have a different opinion than they do. The problem, again, is not that our opinions differ, but that other people get so personal with us when ours do not match theirs. It is a problem, and is one that is apparently HUGE.

I hate to sound like a whiner, but, over these last couple of weeks, we are all lots more…hyper-sensitive…and we are each and all thinking about just winning some strange battle with people we have known for many years, or even a couple of years, and people we know not at all. We are ready to fight with people over our opinions, and the reason is because our opinions are deeply rooted as being part of our ego-selves and our ego-selves are not liking feeling like we are being treated like what we think we are entitled to versus what it is that we deserve.

What we are entitled to is nothing.

What we deserve is nothing less than what we have given to others in terms of what it is that we felt…were of the opinion that and of…they deserved, as if we were somehow the person who has the right to judge someone else, simply because they disagree with them.

…so, pretty much…be kind to one another.


Yeesh !

Our Collective Pain is Caused by Our Collective Disconnectedness

TMB Johann Hari.jpg

This guy wants us all to know that addiction and freedom from it is NOT a sobriety, not even a chemical thing, but a connectivity thing.

The guy in the picture is Johann Hari.

If you click on the photo, you will be taken to his TED Talk. It is titled Everything You Think You Know About Addiction is Wrong.  And really, the only thing that I can say is that he is correct.

People do not become addicted to anything unless they do not have some sort of connection with at least ONE other human being.

Just one.

That is all that is needed to stave it off.

I know this, for sure.

It’s a brain thing, which leads to an emotional thing.

We are humans. We need to be closely connected to at least one other person, no matter who they are. As long as they are healthy, and as long as they are true, addiction has a lesser chance of happening. If more people would stop being jerks to those who are addicted to anything at all, and realize that the reason their loved ones are addicted is NOT because of what they are assuming it is, there will be a better chance of those who are addicted no longer being addicted.

It is not a choice. It is an ailment.

It is not a crime. It is something that lots of people judge as being bad, rather than what it really is, which is a sickness, even a disease that kills the soul.

That is…until the addiction can be dealt with. The way that we deal with anything like this is to ask the question, NOT of how they got addicted to a substance, but, how it was that it was allowed that our loved ones, no matter who they are, got into this mess to begin with?

It is a connectivity thing.

I have always thought this way – that the people who are hurting simply got tired of hurting, simply needed a way to escape their pain, and simply, they turned to something that they would eventually have in common with another person. People, by and large, connect with us. When we have a divine connection, we have something to look forward to with one other person. When we are sure of that connection, becoming addicted to anything becomes less of a threat. When we have a human connection with and to just one other significant person in our lives, it makes all the difference in the world, even if the healing takes place after the fact. (Because not all people who are part of the reason why people end up wanting to be healed will be around after the fact – some of them come into our lives to make the addiction happen, so that through the soul, we can filter the addiction, and perhaps even them, out of our awareness….harsh…but true…please, keep reading)

We demonize these people. We tell them to get help and then we abandon them. We tell them that they are loved, give them ultimatums and then, turn away from them. We want people to be there for us, but, when it comes down to it, we don’t want to deal with the issue that perhaps we do not realize we were a part and party to these loved ones becoming what they become.

We end up throwing more pain at them and BANG!

It starts…and we tell them, again and again, to get help, and we don’t realize that we are part of their pain and part of their madness. We want them to do what we want them to do, but not for THEIR purpose only…but selfishly, ours, as well. We know they need help, but it is beyond what we are offering in terms of what kind of help…

Not just a kick ass residential treatment program. Not just group therapy with other addicts. Not just the things that we have all been told is the truth. And there are a lot of things that we have been told is the truth.

I know a whole lot of people who have been there, and have done that, and the entire world has this..agenda…to criminalize these people when in reality, it is not their issues that make them a criminal rather than them being someone who is suffering emotionally.

It is not a crime to be an addict, even though some of the things that addicts do are criminal in nature. I will not sit here and tell anyone that they are wrong for hurting, and I will not further make people who hurt, hurt more, and no way at all will I agree with the idea that once an addict, always an addict, or the idea that they cannot be trusted, just because they are addicted, because they are hurting, and that is how I will  choose to see them – hurting, and not needing to be hurt anymore.

However, there is another group with whom I have an issue, namely when it comes to other peoples’ addictions – the ones who have been there, done that, and think that they know the on;y reason and reality of why people are addicted. I want to ask those who would make these hurting people hurt more why it is that they forgot about what it was like to hurt that badly, enough to have to mask the pain with substance or activity or things…why are you demonizing them, and more, why is it that you want to believe that you trying to help them, by making them see what they will lose (because they already know what they are going to lose…didn’t you?)…how about show them how YOU are doing now? Would that not be the right way to do this? Show them how well you did? Point it out without being a douche bag about it and make certain that they know and believe that really, you mean every word you gave them in confidence to their issues?

You know they hurt, and because they hurt, they make promises that they do not realize that they cannot keep. In that moment, when they are trying hard, they …we…are told that we must be high – because why else would we be nice to them, and why else would we be normal, and why else would it matter what we think of them and them of us?

Why, most of all, would we feel the need to judge someone in pain? And why, of course, is anyone criminalizing people who need healing, not more to hurt about?

Because they are not criminals, per se…they are doing criminal things to support their addiction.

Criminals are typically born that way. Addicts are in pain, and pain is given to us by others who are also in pain.

I know this. I am no stranger to pain. I am no stranger to wanting to get rid of my pain through outer means. In my case, it was pills and booze. In my case, it was drinking and forgetting. In my case, it was anything but criminal and the things that were happening to me WERE criminal…but, I was the bad one. I was the one with the problem…

Blame the addict, not the things going on in the lives and in the soul of them….these are bad people. They are out of control.

This, I have found, because I have asked, is the opinion of the populace at large.

It is not everyone who thinks this way…just a vast majority.

This needs to be corrected. 

This is not my stating that there are not people who are both addicts and shitty human beings. This is my stating that not all addicted people, no matter what it is that they may be addicted to, are shitty people, and this is to say that not all addicts remain addicts.

There are a lot of people on this planet who seem to think that since they have been there, and have done that, and made it out alive and able to tell their story of redemption, that somehow they are the people who have been sent here to make sure that not only other addicts know that they did it themselves, but that those other addicts, even if they do not outright state so, are somehow dirty and evil, and no…no they are not.

What they are is sick.

What they are is involuntarily disconnected  from everyone who they love, trust, need in their lives, NOT to pander to their addictions, but, instead, continue to Love them for who they are, and who they want to be again. 

This is something that I know a lot of people do not want to think is the truth, and until the day came that my guy told me that addicts, we must remember, really have no idea what they are doing once it is that they find themselves helpless and hopelessly stuck in the idea that they are somehow not good human beings.

He has said this to me for months now, about a person who he specifically knows is my family, is someone who I care about and who I want to see the best life happen for. There are people who he knows, who he also cares a great deal about, and because of his explanation of things from the other side of it, I was prompted to learn a bit more about it and to be more open to the idea that there is more than one way to become an addict, and that not all of it is tied to trying things out just once.

Much of it is tied to pain and much of it is tied to being ignored, to being told who you are instead of knowing for sure that who you are for real is good enough for you, and to hell with everyone else. His sharing with me about certain periods of his own life, and me with him about mine, clearly pointed to one thing and one thing that I did not know that I was doing and one thing that I had not thought about and damn surely – I did not like it when others were telling me that I was this, that and the other.

Since I had been there, and done that, I, too, became, in that instance, the thing that I did not want to be.

I became a know it all, and really, outside of my own issue – I knew NOTHING.

Let us get one thing very adequately and dearly understood  – that someone is an addict only means one thing: they needed something to make themselves feel better about anything, and when they could not find that very one person who they could depend on to be there for them, in every way but specifically the “I am here for you for real” way, they felt like they had, like they have, nothing.

That is a very lonely place to be.

I know now that the thing that I was addicted to was NOT any substance, but, the very thought that in my own abilities, I could change a person (I CANNOT AND NEITHER CAN ANYONE ELSE). I tried, relentlessly, to get the man who abused me for twenty-five years of my life, NOT to be good to me, because I no longer cared and neither care what this person thinks of me, because the only “relationship” that there is left is in the sense that is “okay…so you’re their dad…be their dad…”

What I care about is that people are heard, cared about, believed, namely if they have been through a hell that no one else can bother with wanting to know about- when you have been through stuff, and stuff that sucks ass, you, me, we all want at least one other person we have something in common with, that we have a Divine connection with, to be in our lives.

A Divine Connection

I bet you each thought I was writing about addiction, and perhaps that I might even be trying to promote community programs for them.

If that is what you are getting from this, okay, great.

But, the truth is that the thing that I am promoting here is NOT that.

It is the Divine Connection.

We have a connection to one another. We are tied to one another energetically. When someone in our personal tribe of souls hurts, we all hurt. When we are disconnected, we do not realize that we are. When we have these thoughts of grandiosity about what is wrong about us and bad about us, we lose ourselves in that grandiosity, in that place where we want to think is the truth and the truth that we keep hanging on to.

We want the world to think we are okay and when the world finds out that we are not, it is the world, not our truest, closest people, who will turn its back.

It is through these …anomalies…in our own lives that we find out who is there for us, ,who will love us, no matter what. It is when we are so invested in our own pain and in that pain one other person sees us through the lens that is Love rather than chastisement that we begin to see who we are breaking through the darkness of the false self created by the pain and by the way that we deal with the pain.

When we realize that we have come to that place that no one else can relate with, and we know that we are there and still alive and well and breathing…we know Love, and we know the Truth of who we are, no matter who wants to tell us that we are bad because we got hold of some bad chemicals, or bad foods, or bad habits…and called them good for us.

My friends….addiction is not a one person illness. It is an illness that affects all of us, and one that we can conquer, if we know the truth of a person. I know the truths of lots and lots of people, and through all of their pain, all of their struggle, for some of them, I have remained that one person who, even if I am only their cleric, does not make them feel like they are criminals. I will not lie and say that there have not been one or two who I have had to involve the police in, but that is because their addiction led them to become a threat to others, which always and ultimately leads them to also become a threat to themselves.

In that energy, I will leave you with this…

…when you have the opportunity to be of good cause to anyone else, but specifically to those who are hurting, don’t pass it up – you are being met with that person because Spirit has sent them to you for a reason. You either have a lesson to learn from them that you, specifically need to learn, and lots of times, there is more than only one lesson, perhaps several, all to be learned by one person.

When you have the means within you, within your soul, and you know without a doubt that this person who you love is hurting, reach out to them, and don’t make them be alone in this time in their lives, make them be on their own when really, they didn’t get to this place on their own. Shitty people came into their lives and made them hurt somehow. Perhaps it is your job to show them that they do not need to hurt or perhaps it is you who needs to learn how to not hurt others, others who totally need a Divine Connection. Do what you must to protect yourselves, but by all means, reach out and let them know that they are not alone.

It is in the darkness that is being alone and feeling every bit of it, is in knowing that tangibly there is no one else there who we can talk with and who will “get it” in terms of what we are experiencing where you will make the most amount of difference for anyone else at all.

It is within us each and all to look past what is the social agreement that everyone seems to have, with whoever and for whatever reason we have them, that is in charge of us. We are worried what everyone else will think about our choices about that person and what that person is going through that we will forget about, and lots of us who have been there and done that hold the key to their wellness, each and every single last one of us.

It is within the heart of the ailing who only wants to be heard, listened to, taken seriously, and most of all, loved that we will reach them…

It is the Divine Connection of Love between Human Souls that is the remedy…and not the assumptions based on whatever it is that anyone “tough love’ wants to believe.

Love is Love….it is neither tough, nor gentle. It is Love.

Love is the answer

It is the Cure







No matter what…PRAY !


Hawai’ians call it Pule…which translates to the word “Pray” in the English language. None the less, and no matter what, now is the time that we each and all NEED to  Pray for each other and more importantly, to pray for our very selves…

I am no stranger to the Hawai’ian version of what these African-American women are, which are obviously followers of the Christian religion, in one of its many forms. The thing that they are doing in this photo is obvious and ought to be obvious to any one of us…they are praying, and for the most part, we, as a collective, do not do nearly enough of it….

For the very first time in a very long time, the one thing that I am writing about, not only to remind me, but more, to remind all of us of is that there is one thing that none of these …self-help, new age-ish, “metaphysical” teachers, gurus, “experts” are telling anyone, and for the life of me, I cannot figure out WHY !

When all else (seems) to fail, do what your Nana taught you to do and PRAY!


This is a photo of my grandmother, the person to whom we each and all referred to as being “Nana.” Her name was (is) Katherine.

I sometimes loved her more than I loved breathing, still love her, and love her because she taught all of us the value of praying, the value of believing that outside of the very each of us is a power bigger than we are, and that all we have to do is believe that this power is there to help us along in our lives. While it is that I did not become the minister that I am sure she would have loved to know was her grand-daughter, I became one who would carry on her very spiritual tradition of praying, always praying.

My Nana, no matter who says otherwise, was always praying, always thanking her god for all she had in her life and while she was in her body, the thing that she asked me, even well into my adulthood, was…is…if I remembered to pray before going to sleep.

Of course I did.

Of course I do.

Of course!

Whether anyone reading this wants to believe me when I write this, the truth is that scientifically, prayer WORKS. Scientifically, and if you and anyone else reading this with you wants to check it out, the best thing that I can use as that proof is that in the world of Quantum Physics, and by the tutelage of two of my most favorite instructors at MtSac (Hello Professors Lane), prayer WORKS. Prayer has attached to it this thing called energy. In our Universe there are these things called endless possibilities, and within those things are the very kernels of miraculous things happening for the each and every one of us.

When we pray, it is our intention that brings us what we need, and most importantly, brings what is our focus rather than what is our desire, whether it is tangible or intangible. The fact of the matter is that when we pray, we send our fervent energies to the Universe, we send the very dearest and deepest thoughts and desires to the All That Is, and when we do so with full faith – even as it might take a little bit of time to get to us, the bottom line truth is that praying works, no matter what.

Praying Works…no matter what…

Here is the clincher in all of this prayer working and stuff…you have to believe that the things that you are petitioning Spirit about are going to happen – those things, or better.

That is the only way that the Law of Attraction can work – it takes an equal amount of energy that is balanced, and balanced in many ways and with many things involved and things that not a lot of us think about when we are praying. This is where the science of it all comes in and the way that we have been trained (read:LIED TO) to think is that there is only one way to get our way, and it is the right way – it is called Praying. What we are NOT told is that what we are actually doing is sending our very distinct energy along with our very distinct vibration along with our most prevalent thought and through this mechanism called prayer, we are getting our lives on the Paths we each and all belong on.

Once we can get away from the ego-sense of “getting what we want” and more, the idea that there are a few of us on this planet who still think that the reason we would pray is because we want to turn our personal god into the junkyard dog that it is not. Prayer, you see, is our direct connection to the Divine.

Direct Connection to the Divine

This is the part that I like the most – the part that I get to tell my readers things that they were not taught or told in church when they were small kids.

Perhaps it is just me and my thoughts about it all but, for some weird and odd reason, lots of pastors like to pretend that they are the very ones, are the only ones, who have the right frequency when addressing their specific god.

The thing that I like making clear to EVERYONE is that you can call your god “God” or “Godde” or “Ralph” or “Ignacius” and it won’t matter, because no matter what, we are all Divinely connected to Spirit. There is no level that is greater or stronger than is anyone else’s, and the truth of the matter is that in the eyes of Spirit, we are all the very same – there is no one who is better than anyone else, and there is no one who has more pull in the eyes of whatever form or name you address your own personal deity as – it is all One Source.

Let not one other human being tell you that there is some sort of …caste system…in terms of praying and who is able to get Spirit to hear our words better. There is no one better than anyone else, just those who are more adept at praying because it is their Spiritual gift.


Praying effectively is a GIFT OF SPIRIT

Not all of us are able to use prayer in the manner that a whole lot of people, specifically those who are considered to be “old school” are. This is where the thing our grandmas taught all of us of a certain era the fluid nature, the beauty inherent within, the truth in every word said as a prayer.

We do not realize that the other thing that we were not taught about, and that that is no matter what you want to believe – if you believe in your own prayers and the strength inherent in them all and each, you will get what you need – perhaps not what you think you want (which is always the truth, even if the truth is going to suck) but totally and truly and only what your soul needs to move on to the next level of things.

And bear in mind, please, that we are always and ever moving on to the next level of things, even when it seems otherwise. When it seems otherwise is when we are squarely in the middle of things, squarely in the heat of it all, and truly in the midst of change. This is the thing that we are not taught during those times as kids, sitting in the pews, told to trust an unseen god and to follow these archaic rules that this unseen god needs us to heed. I am here to tell you that those rules only apply to those who are following the tenets of that belief and that the idea that anyone’s big scary god picks and chooses is just and only that – a damned idea, but one that never pans out.

Yet, that is beside the point. The thing about this writing today is that we all need to understand that when it comes to the things in our lives that we need on the ethereal level, the one thing that no one thinks about is that always, prayer works, even though the way that it works is NOT to bring us what we want…because those things are ours to see to with the help of Spirit backing us. Prayer works because we have a belief in our own power as souls who are worthy of the beauty that is life, and that even as we have to (yes – HAVE TO) go through things that we do not understand are actually serving us, we forget that all things come to an end, and that this also applies to things that suck.

The way that prayer works in terms of changing things is on the internal level, where it is that the quantum field reacts the best, because the quantum field, according to Richard Feynman, is composed of “little things composed of littler things that jiggle.” It is in the jiggle of the prayer energy where we will find the miracle we plant the seed for, and not in the end result we hope to see happen. When we pray with the intention that we are praying for the entirety of human life, with the thought that the thing we are praying about is the thing that will bring us the most good in terms of life on the planet – we are praying for the highest best good, period, not only for ourselves, but for the entire race of humans, even the ones we don’t get along with.

When you feel like nothing else will work, and you have exhausted the monies you have set aside for all of these great self-help things, and when you are done with spending money on other peoples’ methods for addressing the Divine, you can pray.

Praying is free. Praying allows you to hear your own fears as they present themselves in the manner that they have that would cause you to feel like you need to do something in order that you can feel better about anything at all, specifically anything that you are confused about.

Praying is private and is the one thing that anyone of us can do at any time at all, even if it is a last minute thing. Praying brings the very soul to the body for assistance, which is not something that all of us thinks about when we are praying – typically it is the body coming to the Soul, but when we pray, because prayers are spoken, even whispered, it is the Soul coming to the body for assistance.

Prayer is personal, and it includes our very personal energetic signature, meaning that so long as we are ever true to who we are, and even though it might take a little longer than we care to wait for things to change, prayer is the thing that, so long as we believe (and do so like a Pisces – it is our motto = “I Believe”…and typically, we are right in our belief…rarely are we not) in the power, not only of our words, but more, of our Souls as Self.

It is the Soul as Self that actually directs things. When we pray, we ought to do so from the very core middle of our Souls as Self. The Soul as Self is the Soul with your distinct and unique personality attached to it. It is the part of the very each of us that reaches out when things are ugly, when things hurt, when things are a confusing mess and when things just seem to not be agreeing with what it is that we have had mapped out for our lives and our future. I know this one very personally.

Very Personally….’tis the Goddess Who I Know so very well

Like my mother knows her own personal god so very well, I, too, know the One to Whom all of my fervent prayers go to.

We all have our own deity.

Mine is the Goddess.

I come from an indigenous culture, and one rife with many different gods and goddesses, and all of them created by us, in our own image, and through us, via our own personal power. This way, there is no chance that what has happened the world over in terms of gods and religious belief cannot happen when we are talking about being personally connected with our own beings of Divinity.

Mine is the Goddess.

I know the Goddess, because I place my own well-being, not in Her hands, but, in my hands and trust that She will guide my hands as they write, and as they research, and as they give love and receive love. My hands do my talking for me, in both writing and in dance, and my hands are the things that I ask to please continue to give to me the things that I need to get my own point across, to please be the very vehicle through which understanding by the masses in terms of Spirit and all things strange comes to the world by, and most importantly, to please never allow these hands of mine to become violent, to do harm to others with them, knowing that I could do a whole lot of damage that way, and that way does not need to happen, at least not by my hands.

Seriously – PRAY

Pray for EVERYTHING in your life, and believe the things that you pray for are the very things that, in your life, are needed so as to make that life become all that you envision it being.  Pray when things are bad, but more than that and more importantly, PRAY WHEN THINGS ARE AWESOME AND WHEN YOU DO, DO NOT FORGET TO HAVE AN ENERGY OF GRATITUDE, even if you feel like you don’t wanna do that, because maybe you might feel like you have nothing to really be grateful for. And really, there is ALWAYS something to be very dearly grateful for, even when things are shitty,there are things to say “thanks” for  (such as our ability to think, to pray, to make shit happen on our behalf….)

Seriously, when you have no peace, and you need some, practice your own measure of prayer.

Seriously, when you have to think about something that you would rather not, and you believe that you have a choice to make that the only choices are “shitty” and “shittier” and of those two choices, you have to take the shittier one – PRAY, because in your whispered moments you will find out that all along, you have had the very answers that you needed.

Seriously, when the shit hits the fan, as Polly Ana as it might seem to be, pray. Pray right then and in that moment, and pray because it was the thing that you turned to as a saving measure, not for anything more than to save you as a child from being terrified of things that you have had no control over.

Just pray.

No matter what, do like your own Nana taught you and pray child, pray !! 





Behind the Mask is the Freedom of Truth…


The entirety of humankind has been through the very most tumultuous time in life, and lots of us are still going through it all. What no one is thinking about is the thing that has happened, and it is revealing as to who we are for real. Who we are for real is nothing short of Magnificent, even if it feels or appears to be otherwise. I Promise you each and all…it isn’t.

My friends, the one thing that not a lot of us can see or feel right at this moment is relief from the emotional ugliness that we have been feeling, and feeling due to the tangible awareness that is collectively ours at this time. There are so very many of us right this moment experiencing losses that are astounding on many levels, and the one level that it is most important that we understand that this is all taking place because of, is the level of the Soul.

The Level of The Soul

Until someone comes into our lives who can explain the reason behind things that suck and that happen in our lives are meant to show us where we are growing and where it is that the changes being made there are for our growth and lend to the person who we are becoming, we will only see the things contained within that energy as being destructive (which it is, but this does not make it a bad thing. Please, keep reading) to who we are in the manner that is making us believe that we are meant to no longer be in this consciousness. The other thing that happens is that we, through no fault of our own, will come to a point where we finally and forgivingly, will think about what is best for us, rather than trying to appease someone else, all so that we do not have to go through the guilt of having been part of something that did not pan out or perhaps that we believe has harmed another person.

I have this friend…

Seriously, I have this friend who I spoke with this morning and who, for a very long time, was not realizing the level of hurt that he was bringing to another very good friend. The friend from this phone call truly needed to be told the truth of things, even though, by right of what I am (ordained), there were things that I could not explain to him, not only because the law will not allow me to, but, because those things are the very things that this man is learning.

When we are given to the pains that we do not realize are teaching us how to deal with those pains, we fret, we get ugly verbally, we make threats as to what we are planning to do – to them, to ourselves, to everyone and anyone at all, and all we have to do is have the understanding the only the vocabulary needs to change so that we CAN have OUR OWN PERSONAL understanding of things, namely the ugliness in our lives.

We might not like those pains, and we might not like the things that we are learning, and we might not understand why it was that we had to go through anything at all. What we do understand is that we are hurting, and we are confused and we are not in the energy that we prefer to be wrapped in. We humans prefer to be wrapped in comfort, specifically in the comfortable things that made us feel okay in the past. What we are not each and all (myself included) thinking is that it is NOT the comfort that we are seeking, but more a way of not having to experience that same discomfort.

This is a very human thing to do. It is also a very ego-self thing to do, seeing as that being human beings, we are going to do everything we can to not have to feel that pain. Some of us avoid the pain by avoiding all of the things that would bring us pain (such as responding to texts, emails, answering phone calls and voicemails…I am a HUGE HUGE violator of this one…HUGE), while others of us numb our pain by using things outside of ourselves that will (WILL) harm us physically. Of course, there are those of us, in fact the majority of us, who want to believe that we will wake up one day and all of this shit will be magically gone and over with.

Yet, we each and all also know that once we are done with this process and finished dealing with this one pattern that is particular to all of us, we go through the process, the very one that we, from the time that we were younger people, created. And the one thing that I really need understood is that there is no wrong way to feel about these things. The way that we feel about anything at all is just that – a feeling, and really, the only thing that anyone’s own feelings are going to hurt is the person who is having those feelings. When the feeling goes away (and it takes time for it to go away and become something other than what will make us continue to hurt) and we see the realness of what we are feeling for real is when the healing process can start.

I say “can” start because we have to choose it.

We have to choose to be whole. We have to choose it that there is a reason to be okay, and we have to choose it to be this way because in being this way we are also able to know that from it all we have learned valuable things about who we are for real, about who loves us the way that we need to be loved in the manner that Spirit also needs for us to know that we are worthy of. We need to know that what we are going through is meant to be a two-fold thing – meant to teach us what we need to know, and meant to give us the gift of our stronger, truer Self.

The thing that we are never taught when we are kids is that we are meant to be stand alone in our power, and being stand alone in our power requires that we go through the same things that others like us are also going to go through at another time in their lives. It is our job to be able to counsel these people when the shit hits the fan in their lives. We have to be able to tell complete strangers that they are going to live through this, that this is not the end of the world but rather and only the end of the part of life that no longer serves them with a purpose that also lends to serving the grander purpose that we each and all are meant to live out in this lifetime.

When I presented my good friend with the other side of his possibilities, and told him that right this moment, regardless of what he wants to hang on to, regardless of what it is that he is hoping, the one thing that I am most proud of this person for is recognizing that lots of what he is going through right now is no one’s doing but his very own. He knows that he has to be there for him first, that nothing that he does is going to make things different and that no way can we go backwards to change the past – he knows, very well at this stage, that he must move forward, because in doing so, he will grow and will realize that he was meant for this to happen this way, as he was learning something very dearly important.

Things that are very dearly important

We assign measures of importance to things, to times in our lives, to people and to energies. What we do not think about when we are doing this is that we are not only limiting the power symbolized by those things, but, we are also, because at that moment we choose to become dependent on the power that we have assigned to that rune, as given by the rune, which in turn creates the symbol to become an idol, and idol worship is a no-no.

What we can do with those things is we can use them to create an energy within, giving ourselves the power that we have assigned to the things we love so very much.

Lots of people want to ascribe ugly energy to people like me. I suppose, and this is not the thing that I, myself, believe, that if we have to get down to the understanding of certain ethnic words, that the word “Kahuna” could entirely mean “witch.” While this is a way for those who do not know what this actually means and neither the power inherent and contained within it, it is not the truth of the word.

While it can be applied to me (come on now…we all know the truth of this – I LIKE THE WEIRDNESS…lol…please, keep reading), what cannot be is the idea that what I do, in that energy, is evil, because it is not (being a Healer who is also a practitioner of the Craft is NOT evil – BY ANY MEANS…) (“The Craft”…”Divine Arts”…”Miracle Working” – IT IS ALL THE VERY SAME). This applies in the manner that is the idea that people who do the things that I do are evil, that all we are doing is wrecking the world for the future, and that where we came from (in the indigenous sense) never really existed until some people from a far more …westernized and advanced place…came and took what was ours. 

This can apply in a sense in terms of what you are reading here – when we realize that not only did we believe what it was that was bad that others have said about us, but, we chose to wear it, because at the time, it seemed to fit – we realize who we are for real. When we chose to remain as that which we might have been at one time in the past, we end up stifling ourselves, and through that stifling we also end up remembering who we were and who we were at times in our lives when the energy that is prevalent will allow us to recall. For a lot of us, those memories, while they are rife with beauty, they are also rife with pain, even if the pain involved is because of the hurt caused by the loss of that memory.

We hurt from these things for a reason

The reason is simple – because those things, no matter how much we love them, no longer serve us.

I am not saying that there are people who we gotta get rid of, memories that we would be better off not having, even though they are memories that contain the value of who we were to these others at another time in our lives, things we have not grown attached to. I AM saying that we are still valued by them, except that our value has been raised because we are not the same people who we were. I AM saying that those memories taught us about who we were then, helped us become who we are now, so that we would be able to finish creating the newer, higher-minded version of our Self. I AM saying that those things that we love so very much can be held in our hearts, if not in any tangible means. This is not saying to get rid of things, or even to say goodbye to them. It is stating that we no longer have to think of them as being a powerful thing in our lives at this time. It is stating that for all intents and purposes, those times, people, memories, things all played a very crucial role in the becoming of You.

The Becoming of You

This is the part that not a lot of us thinks about – we are becoming who we are supposed to be. If we are becoming who we are supposed to be, everything that we once were will no longer serve us. No matter how much we think we need them to, no matter how much we want to reach back there and try to make that version of us fit into the higher-minded version of the lives that now we are living, no matter what – when something has been purposeful in our lives, and that actual tangible thing, no matter how much energy we put into it, no matter how much we want to complete what we think is the mission in terms of that one thing or energy – NO MATTER WHAT – when the time for us to learn from that thing, or the loss of that thing, has come, we have to let it go. If it is meant, it will be ours again, no matter what.

The Universe is funny that way.

The Universe will hurt our feelings so that we don’t harm our reality. The Universe will make tears fall, so that sometime in the future, we can know that the reason that they fall are many, but that in that one instance, they are needed, for whatever reason it is that they feel like they are going to fall. The Universe wants us to know that it knows that we hurt, but the Universe also wants us to know, too, that we are being prepared for bigger, and better…everything. The way that we know this is through the people in our lives.

The people in our lives are there for a reason. In my life, there is one person who came in about three years ago and made me know that whatever I was told by anyone else about me in terms of being who I am, those people were wrong. The Maestro, no matter what anyone, including he, wants to believe of himself, is the same in equivalent energy and in terms of prowess as mediumship, healer and seer, that I am. He does not understand how it is that the one person who he deems as being the most highest form of that weirdness has equated her very self with him, but it is the truth. When we are shown the truth of us through others, and we spend a significant amount of time with those others, not only do their habits and the like tend to become our own (and good goddess let’s hope they are the good ones and not the ones that we are each and all trying to remap in our brains), but, so, too, do the abilities.

I have a very dear ability with all things weirdness. He does not realize that so, too, does he.

When we look at those in our lives who are the very closest to us, and we see in them what it is that we want also for ourselves…we do not realize that right at that moment, that one thought is activated…

What thought, and about whom, will you be activating? Which one of those people closest to you will you be seeing in your Self today?






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